Three steps to stepping out of loss in life.
In life you will face challenges that you did not expect. Your comfortable reality will come under a cloud and it will rain on your parade.
The first big lesson of life one has to learn is that your comfort zone comes with an expiry date. And you should be grateful for that law of nature.
But it’s a skill to know how to get out of it fast and forward.
When life pokes you a pineapple — you have to learn how to make it into a Pina colada without feeling the fear of failing.
Here is my recipe that I used on myself and it worked on me.
Step 1 — Suffer.
Strange as it may sound but you have to enjoy and accept that it will hurt. Just accept that when it bleeds the wound will hurt. It’s a natural act of the body to let you know you need to rest that part of your body and give it attention. Give it some bandage and cover it. But also know that nature will make the blood clot. The wound will scab and eventually it will mend.
But we spend way too much time resisting the pain. We want to wish it away instantly. And when it persists — the pain becomes suffering and that is in the mind and it’s very hard to handle.
Instead I recommend you decide to suffer. Cry, call your mum/friend, sleep, isolate yourself, listen to sad songs, eat and drink in excess, indulge your pain. Go into your cave and linger in your self. But don’t give up on yourself. Know that you are whole and complete and that suffering is a natural way of peeling off the old you and revealing a new better , higher self in you.
Make time to suffer.
You have to know that you are a spiritually enlightened being inside a temporary human body. And the whole of your time on this planet you have the duty of revealing and awakening to this truth. Pain is an integral part of the adventure called life.
But suffering is just step 1.
Step 2 — Recover
The next stage is to recover. Start small. Go for short walks. And then long ones. Start moving around. Go sit in the sun and get some Vitamin D therapy. Start journaling, reading, listening to wise words on YouTube and read books by great minds like Sam Harris, Alan Watts, Friedrich Nietzsche , Eckhart Tolle…consider becoming a secret Stoic, listen to anything that talks about how to heal from loss and pain.
Call your therapist. Start to enjoy your day and your present moment. Suffering and recovering are a tango. Let them.
The music of this tango is called gratitude.
Play it as often as you can in your mind. Fill your playlist with forgivenesses. Slowly but surely you will start to count your blessings. And the suffering and the recovering will blend into a single healthy body and mind.
Get yourself a psychedelic session of Magic Mushrooms.
Make sure you read enough on it and get the product from a reliable source but a few sessions in the right setting can be revolutionary in your healing process.
The drug rewires your default mode network and gets your mind thinking optimistically better than meditation can. But mediate regularly as well. It’s a great habit. I will write more about this in a separate blog.
Start exercising. It’s a magic drug that the body uses to release all the juicy oxytocin’s and serotonin it has inside. Find your own version of it. But make sure your heart pounds and your muscles ache. Focus on a part of your body you want to build the most and then do it daily. Specially in the day you don’t want to do it.
Consume alcohol in moderation and start cooking. Cook and drink together with your partner/ friend.
Have a lot of sex. Or masturbate whenever you feel like it. Use the body’s natural source of feel good chemicals to heal the damaged cells in the body and mind. Sexual energy has a great cleansing power if you use it for self healing and self love.
Become deeply involved with your current reality and try to spend quality time with your loved ones. It’s a great healer to show unconditional love and gratitude for those you love. The energy of this act has an amazing resonance inside you. It’s like burning an incense in the room and letting it perfume the room.
I have spent some of the best days of my life recently with my wife and found a new depth of friendship there that we had forgotten.
Step 3 — Soar
This step involves acting on your impulse to grow. Find your true passion and then act on it. Start flapping those wings. And let the wind do the rest.
I love to write and build my property business and think and write about empathetic brands and their strategy. I do all that now without too much expectation of material return. And the effect is manifold. I get the joy in the moment and the material reward as well.
Funny that. You get how you feel.
I am still growing in this new stage of my life but I can feel that wind in my face. I can feel that I am not static in my mind. The fact that you are reading this is a proof that I am feeling the soar in my muscles.
I hope you try this recipe and I hope that this helps you to get out of your life challenge.
But whatever happens be kind to yourself through the process. Let it take its own time. You are a river. Love your bends and your falls. Know that the river will grow into a delta. Don’t be afraid of the fall. Feel it and flow with it. It’s just a water fall and it looks and feels magnificent if you let it.
You are a beautiful unique act of nature that is here to thrive and learn and evolve.
It’s why you are here. To soar.
Have a tranquil day.